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Guerdon

March 21, 2013

Yes, guerdon.  I had to look that word up.  I had never heard it before.  It means reward.

I have been reading ‘Heidi’ to my daughter at night.  OH, what joy!!! Not just the book, but that i have enough left in my emotional tank to be reading to my daughter at night!  It has been so long. So very, very long.  And i had forgotten how much i enjoy reading to her.

Now, i have never read ‘Heidi’ before, and the movie with Shirley Temple really does no justice to the redemptive story Spyri  wrote.  What caught me tonight was a Hymn in the 17th chapter:

Oh, trust His love to guide thee,

He is a Prince so wise

That what His hands provide thee

Is wondrous in thine eyes.

and He, if He be willing,

May bring the work about

And thus thy hopes fulfilling,

Dispel thy fear and doubt.

Hmmm…. something i am struggling with still.  But it is the next couple of verses that really blew my mind:

It may be for a season

He will no comfort show,

And for some hidden reason

His light will not bestow.

As if no more He heeded

What sorrow was thy share,

Or what relief thou needed

In all thy deep despair.

Yes!!!  I felt this for month after agonizing month.  I cried out to God daily!  I cried to my best friend “why is God doing this?!”  as i sat in my bed unable to do anything because i had lost half the blood in my body.

But if thy faith stays thee

When thou art most perplexed,

He will appear and raise thee

What time thou lease expect’st.

He will remove the burden

That presses thy heart down,

And thou shalt have the guerdon

And thou shalt wear the crown.

(emphasis mine)

WOW!!!  I recognize that this post may seem rather repetitive to the one yesterday. But as i slowly try to grasp at God’s grace and try to see His goodness, i like to be reminded that one day i will be rewarded.  One day He WILL remove the burden that presses my heart down.

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